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Who do you believe you are?

I’m currently reading “Own Your Everyday: Overcome the Pressure to Prove and Show Up for What You Were Made To Do” by Jordan Lee Dooley.

I highly reccomend this book if you are into personal development or want to start owning who you are in this moment. Jordan is full of encouragement and Godly words that can change your perspective on many aspects of life.

In the last chapter I just finished, the quote that stuck out the most to me was as follows,

“We always live out of who we believe we are.”

This one sentence slapped me in the face. It was like a bar fight, me against those ten words, and I lost that fight fair and square.


We ALWAYS live out of WHO WE BELIEVE WE ARE.
Friends, for a majority of my life I BELIEVED I was anxiety.
I BELIEVED I was trauma.
I BELIEVED I was bad luck.
I BELIEVED I was cursed, bad things only happened to Kassidy.

But just like my girl Rachel Hollis says, “We can choose to let things happen TO us or FOR us”
I was letting all of my trauma happen TO me.
Not anymore. I see a new perspective, my trauma, EVEN my brother dying, EVEN me running for my life during a shooting, happened FOR me.

I know what you’re thinking because I thought the same thing. “You’re crazy Kassidy, why would you get caught in a shooting and believe that that WAS WHAT WAS SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN?”
Well let me offer you this perspective, if I hadn’t ran for my life during a mass shooting, if I hadn’t watched the pain and grief of the people around me, I would not be the human I am today.
I would not be able to write the way I write or inspire the way I inspire, because I wouldn’t have THAT story.

“We always live out of who we believe we are”
I believe that my traumas happened for me.
I believe that good will come out of all the shitty things that happen for me.
There is an opportunity every day to choose that life will happen to you or happen for you, what perspective will you choose to believe? Because based off the perspective you choose to believe will decide WHO YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE, and who you believe you are determines how you live your life. That’s big my friends. Like Oprah big.
Your perspective, what you believe about who you are as a human, DETERMINES THE LIFE YOU LIVE.

We have two choices.
They aren’t going to be your favorite choices, and you certainly aren’t going to be able to live this way every day. But it’s worth evaluating and adding to your daily habits.
Your choices are a negative outlook, life is happening TO you.
Or a positive outlook, life is happening FOR you.

Girlfriend, this life is happening FOR YOU!!
Each beautiful, messy part of this life is happening so that you can go out and full-fill your purpose, your dream.
If you don’t start to change your perspective, you’ll never live out the dream that is burning inside you.
And that is a life WASTED. YOU DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE TIMER IS UP.
YOU DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE GOOD LORD IS GOING TO CALL YOU TO THE GATES.
So why waste all of this precious time on a negative perspective? Why not take the things that have happened to you in life, decide they happened FOR you and go out and change the world because those things happened for you and YOU have a story to tell. Not your husband’s, not your sister’s, not your mom’s BFF’s story. YOUR STORY. YOUR DREAM. YOUR PASSION. It’s yours, not theirs, so own it.

AND START TODAY! Take a hold of this new found fire (that hopefully started burning as you read through this blog!) and RUN WITH IT!!!
RUN WITH THE FIRE! CHASE THOSE DREAMS!
BE THE WOMEN YOU WERE MADE TO BE!

The time is now.
Tomorrow, the next minute, the next year is not promised.
Do it now.

Kassidy believing she is a HOT MESS EXPRESS.
Because that’s who she is, and she rocks it every day.

Never stop trying

Failure is when you stop trying.

How many times in your life have to SAID you were going to do something for yourself and you didn’t?
That is failure because you didn’t even try.

When you make a promise to yourself, you have to follow through.
At the beginning of this year I promised myself I was going to complete a 5K and a 10K, after never running in my life.
So I made the promise to work out 5 days a week in preparation for these races.
I got up on days I was exhausted, depressed, anxious, and sad.
I got up and I moved my body.
Some days I went straight back to bed, but I never broke the promise I made to myself that I would train for these races.

What this training process has taught me is that my persistence is a badass, she knew I needed to get up every day and train for these races because it was actually training me for something so much bigger than a 10K.

It was training me to keep promises to Kassidy.
It was training me to never give up on the girl who’s given up on herself her whole life.
It was training me to see the light I had within me but never saw for myself.

So yes, there were days I got up and didn’t go to the gym.
There were days I went and really didn’t give it my all.
But I did not fail, because I never stopped trying.
I always got up and tried again the next day.

After my latest blog post I had several of you reach out to me saying that it inspired you to start going to the gym or start reaching for your dreams. I am so blessed to have had my words impact you in that way, however, we have to face the hard truth. Failure is in the back of your mind. You’re wondering if you can ACTUALLY get to the gym at 5 am or if you can ACTUALLY become a comedian. But the thing is, you’ll never know until you try. And then whatever comes of trying today, might bring you closer to that dream or that goal. So then you get up again tomorrow and you try one more time, and then again and again. Until you’ve made it on that stage or you’ve ran that 10K.

The other day I finally made it to that moment of victory.
I woke up like I normally do at 4:30, and I thought to myself… “Kassidy is going to run 6.2 Miles today (a 10K)”. This thought was coming straight from my persistence and she was not giving up. The short drive to the gym all I could think about was 6 miles. Mind you, I’ve never ran more than 4 miles without stopping, which is good because my race isn’t until November. But my persistence persisted on, “Kassidy, you’re running a 10k today!”

I got on the treadmill and started running, mile 2 is my struggle, I always convince myself 2 miles is enough but my goal has never been to just run 2 miles. About 3 miles in the fire alarm starts going off (it wasn’t a real fire, it’s just a glitch in the system lol) but when the fire alarm goes off, so does the AC. So here I am, mile 3, no AC, and a alarm sounding through my headphones. “Okay… you can technically stop here I mean 3 miles is half way, you’ll get to 6 later!” I told myself. Then persistence chimes in, “OH HELL TO THE NO GIRL! NOT TODAY! DID I NOT ALREADY TELL YOU THAT YOU ARE RUNNING 6 MILES TODAY?”
Okay, chill girl, chill.

While I’m talking to myself, a women gets on the treadmill to the left of me and shortly after her another women to the right of me. Then my playlist plays “Run The World” by Beyonc√©, and I’m back. I’m ready to finish this damn thing! I’ve got two powerhouse women running next to me like it’s easy and I am STRUGGLING, like panting, sweating, red faced, half in an asthma attack. But okay here we are MILE 6. I’m telling myself, “well I mean you already did 5 that’s more than you’ve ever done before.” But persistence is over here like, “5 miles is for babies get your ass over that finish line.”

My persistence is crude. She has to be to get through to my stubborn self.

And then friends, there it was. 6.24 Miles, FINITO!!!!!
I DONE DID IT!!! HELL YES!!!

I walk outside and saw the most gorgeous sunrise God had painted me for my victory. I smiled, got in my car, literally every part of my body shaking, and cried. I cried tears of VICTORY! Tears of pure HAPPINESS for what I had just accomplished. I WORKED 7 MONTHS TO RUN 6 MILES! 7 MONTHS!!!!!!!!
And here I was, where I never thought I would be.

In that moment, do you know what I was most grateful for?
My persistence. She never let me fail. She never let me stop trying.
Every day she figured out a way to motivate me into trying a little bit harder for that goal.
And here we were celebrating my triumph.

As I sat in this moment, I made a decision, an agreement to myself.
I will never fail.
I will never stop trying, so therefore I will never fail.
Failure is no longer an option because if I never stop trying, failure cannot exist.

And then I asked myself a question, what’s next?
What’s the next dream?
What are we going to try next?
Where are we going from here?

Sisters.
Make the decision to never fail.
Decide to never stop trying at your dream.
Decide you are worth making and keeping promises to yourself.
Decide to listen to your persistence and push, push, push when the dream gets hard.

So now I will ask you,
What’s next?
What’s the next dream?
What are you going to try next?
Where are you going from here?

Whatever the dream is, lets go get it.
It’s your time.

Click Here: To SHOP My Hot Pink Tassel Earrings

Get out of the way

Sweet friend, you are the roadblock of your dreams.

I hate to break this news to you, but you are the reason your dream has not come true. You are the reason you are not on stage singing, opening that business, or writing that book.

I can say this honestly because I am the one in the way of me achieving my dreams. I’m in my way EVERY DAY.

Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we self sabotage the thing in life that gives us purpose? That make us excited to wake up every day? Because of fear.

Fear tells you that you can’t possibly achieve those dreams in your heart and you let yourself believe that.

Are you going to continue to let fear run your life?
I’m not.
I’ve let him run my mind, my life, my soul for too many years. I’ve wasted countless hours being scared of what ‘might’ happen if I chased my dreams.

I’m WAY too smart to let fear stop me.
I’m WAY too strong to let fear grapple at my throat.
AND SO ARE YOU.

Do not let fear tell you lies that you cannot achieve the thing that God put in your heart.
There is a reason that fire was lit and we will never know the potential that your dream has unless YOU go chase it. Not me, not your friend next door, not your hot boyfriend. YOU. You have to go out and chase the dream the good Lord gave you because he did not give it to anyone else but YOU.

It’s time.

Time to start living in the calling that God has for us.
Time to start believing in the dreams he put in our hearts.
It’s time to believe we are enough to pursue the dream that we have.

It’s time for us to rise up as smart, courageous women and take our dreams on headfirst.

Sister, YOU ARE FAR TOO SMART TO BE THE ONLY THING STANDING IN THE WAY OF YOUR DREAM!
As Elsa from Frozen says, LET IT GO!
Let go of the fear and go after that big audacious dream God has for you.

God chose YOU for this dream.
You and only you.
You MUST live it out.
You MUST follow the desires of your heart.
Get out of the way!


Dreams

Dreams are scary because they are big.

Goliath was scary because he was big, he was actually a giant.
But the young David defeated him with just a single stone and Gods mighty power behind him.

I think our dreams are the Goliath’s of our lives. They are HUGE and scary and intimidating. They taunt us with words, saying you can’t accomplish this! You’re too small to do that! You don’t have enough life experience! Or my favorite, you’re not good enough to accomplish that dream.

But the thing is dreams are not meant to be small.
If dreams were small, they wouldn’t be so scary, they wouldn’t push us out of our comfort zone just enough to allow us to grow.

Dreams are meant to be big.
Goliath was meant to be a giant, because David was meant to defeat him.
Among the other things David was made to do, defeating Goliath was one of them. David just had to recognize he was made for more, and in that moment, that MORE was defeating Goliath.

Do you have a dream in the crevice of your heart?
Do you have a fire in your soul that you have constantly been putting out because you believe the lie that you cannot continue to let the fire flourish within you?

I did. I do.
I have many dreams that are in my heart, and they all look a lot bigger than Goliath.

But what a selfish act it is to not chase those dreams.
Friends, you have a dream for a reason.
It’s because someone else in the world will benefit from your dream.
For instance, this blog had been a dream of mine for YEARS, I sat on it and told my friends, who would all say “GO FOR IT!”. But I never did, once I finally launched this blog, and even now a year later, I am STILL getting messages about how my words have changed peoples lives.
But if I had never chased that dream, If I had never conquered that Goliath, I wouldn’t have helped anyone.
I would have just let the dream slip past me and all the people I could have helped.

So if you’re not able to chase your dream for YOU, chase it for the sister next to you who needs to benefit from YOUR dream.

Our dreams are not merely for US, they are for those around us.

Friends, go out into the world and chase your dreams.
Be who you were made to be and listen to the fire that is in your soul. Don’t hold yourself back. Embrace who you are and the dream inside of you and GO for it!

This week I launched Gracious & Grateful the Shop.
An online boutique of Kassidy’s favorite things.

When I was in college I studied Kinesiology and Pilates, but if you had asked me what I wanted to do with my life, my answer would have been to be a blogger and own a clothing company.
Through lots of research I decided that going virtual was the best fit for the lifestyle I wanted to live, so I decided to pursue the online shop.

But don’t let that easy little paragraph fool you, it wasn’t an easy decision.
I was in a job I hated, then going through one of the hardest bouts of depression I’ve had thus far, all while balancing life in general.


I would call those I love explaining the dream for this store and what I believed it could be, they would all encourage me.
But I would DISCOURAGE MYSELF.
I WAS MY OWN GOLIATH!
I was the one standing in the way of me chasing this dream. And honestly, I am the Goliath standing in the way of all my other dreams.

I still have work to do. I am still learning to believe in myself. To show myself I am enough right where I am. That I have done enough in this life to be proud of. But launching this store was a HUGE stepping stone for me, I conquered a HUGE Goliath, my own self deprecation.

Today, I am proud of my blog, my boutique, and I am proud of Kassidy Lynne OwenBlogger, Store Owner, Pilates Instructor, and all the other accomplishments she’s achieved.

Go chase your dream.

“A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships were built for.”
– John A. Shedd –

To SHOP this look:

It takes a village

It takes a village to feel loved.

One person cannot make you feel fully loved.
One person cannot complete you.

It takes a village to feel loved.

If you rely on one person to make you feel loved, you will fail.
You must have several people you rely on to take care of you in different ways.
Each person in your life will fill your cup in different ways.
They will teach you different lessons, show you a new direction, and love you completely different than someone else would.
Thats what makes humans so unique, each human was hand chosen for this life, completely unique.
Let the humans in your life SHOW you they love you.
Give them the chance to love you in their unique way.

I’ve been letting my people love me.
I’ve been saying yes to spending time with my people, even when my depression says not too.
I’ve been listening to their stories and then sharing mine.
I’ve been letting the people I love, love me.

For so long I believed in different types of love. I’m assuming I got the concept from movies and TV shows. I believed in love from your parents, love from friends, romantic love, and the love you give to a child.
I believed that each love was different. So I would sit around waiting to be loved.

What I’ve realized is love is quite simple, love is in your peoples actions.
You do not just speak the words “I love you”, you prove them.
Every day, you love your people. You encourage them with the words you send them, you show up when they need you, and you remind them who they are when they forget.

How my people show me love is simple.
Its coffee dates at Starbucks.
Its sunsets at the beach.
Its floating in the ocean.
Its in the fast food drive thru.
Its in the words of encouragement when I need it most.
Its the Facetimes, phone calls, and voicemails.
Its the hand written cards.
Its the books they send me.
Its the hugs.
Its the laughter.
Its all the same love.

And it radiates out of all of my people. They radiate love for me but I was just choosing to ignore what was right in front of me.

Friends, if your people are asking to hang out more, to get coffee, or to just spend time with you. They are asking to love on you.
Don’t neglect that.
Let your people love you, THAT is how you fill your cup up.

Let your village love you and you will feel loved.