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CONFESSION: I’M NOT A MIND READER

I’ve been challenging myself this week.
The challenge = to recognize I’m not a mindreader.

I know, you’re like WHAT?! Kassidy!!! You can’t read my mind?! I’m mind blown… (insert sarcasm).

But here’s true, I think I can read your mind.
Here’s my example, Sally from down the street texts me to watch her dogs. I respond and say, “Oh Sally I wish I could but I am out of town this week too“. Sally responds and says, “Ok never-mind then.”
OMG CUE MASSIVE PEOPLE PLEASING CHAOS RED ALERT GOING OFF IN KASSIDY’S HEAD BECAUSE I DID NOT READ.. “Ok never-mind then” I READ.. “OK YOU’RE A HORRIBLE FRIEND, I HATE YOU, AND I’M NEVER TALKING TO YOU AGAIN”.

And there you have, my wonderful mind reading skills.

But what if I just took Sally for the words she said, not the words I interpreted. How would that change, 1. Our relationship, and 2. My relationship with my head.
See when I attempt to read someones mind, I am causing myself more stress by trying to predict what that person is actually trying to say.
I could save myself so much grief by just accepting what they actually said as truth, and then moving on.

My mind is already filled with a million different anxiety’s and stresses.
Trauma has WIRED my brain to think negatively, to think worst case scenario. But when I recognize that I am not a mind reader, that I am just suppose to take people’s words for what they are actually saying- the pressure is off.

I know I am not the only wanna be mind reader.
I know I’m not the only one trying to interpret other peoples words when in actuality they have already spoke them, there is no mysterious other version of what that person has said- just take them for what they say.
What if we just believe them?
We just choose to let go of our not so real mind reading abilities and hear people out for what they are actually saying instead of what we think they are saying.

What if we believe in other peoples words and choose to silent some of our own?
How could we change the world?
How could we dream bigger dreams?

Is perfection really freedom?

Sometimes I get anxious to write my blogs. Not because of my anxiety but because of my fear that they will lack perfection.

There is probably something in your life that creates anxious feelings within your body- mostly because you’re craving perfection.

Here’s an unpopular thing to say as a bloggerI don’t have an answer for you about perfection. lol – no but really, blogs were designed to help make your life easier. “This recipe will help you make dinner in under 20 minutes!”, “6-pack abs, in 5 minutes or less!”, “Childbirth… it will be easy if you read this blog!”
My blog however, I hope never gives you the answers. I hope my blog leaves you with deep questions that only you can dive in and answer.

So lets tackle perfection- why do we strive for perfection in a world where perfection is unachievable?
Why do we expect perfection when it’s physically impossible to be perfect?

per·fec·tion/pərˈfekSH(ə)n/

  1. the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects.

The definition of perfection is interesting because it is described as being ‘free’ of all defects. But I do not believe that NOT having defects will allow you to be free. If I lived a “perfect” life that had no flaws- a story that didn’t involve my brother dying and running for my life in a shooting- I would not be free, I would be shackled. I would be restrained to a life without lessons.

A life without lessons, is not a free life- it is a broken life.

A life full of lessons is a life well spent- it is a life full of stories that taught you and allowed you to grow.
I would choose growth over perfection every time.

Every time I choose to open my computer and write, I am allowing myself to grow. To grow as a writer, a blogger, and as a person.
And every time I write a blog that is not perfect, I am freed.
Freed of the very thing that causes me to grow.

I am grateful that I am not perfect.
I am grateful that I am incapable of writing a perfect blog post, or a perfect Instagram post, or buying the perfect items for my shop.
I am grateful that every time I choose to be imperfect, I am choosing to allow myself to be free.

What things in your life are you forcing to be perfect, when you could allow yourself to instead- be free?

This Monday, I ask you to free yourself.
It’s going to be a challenge, because if you’re anything like me you have several things you try to be perfect at- but just remember, a perfect life is a life without experience, without joy, without adventure.
A life tethered to perfection, and one I personally, do not want to live.

How will you choose to be free today?

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