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My List of Life

A few months into 2020 I got a message questioning why I was working through my bucket list. On one hand, it’s none of your business magical follower :), on the other hand I really wanted to answer from my soul. I do my best to always have the purest intentions in everything I do. I rarely do anything without a purpose or a larger meaning.

Marking things off my bucket list, creating moments that remind me how precious my life is, stopping my every day life to go do something crazy- it’s all taught me some of the most important life lessons. But the #1 thing I’ve learned over the last 7 months is that I am capable of doing absolutely ANYTHING.

I know, we all say it. Our moms tell us when were young, “You can do anything you set your mind too!” But do you actually believe that? When you look deep within you, do you actually believe you can do ANYTHING? I didn’t. I said I did, but I was lying. Until I jumped out of a plane, swam with sharks, took a road trip to the springs, and floated in a hot air balloon. Those moments taught me I can truly do anything I set my mind too.

We can prime ourselves to believe we can do things, but to prove it to yourself is whole other level of believing you can. It’s like that saying, “When people show you who they are, believe them” we are watching their ACTIONS. If you spring into action and show yourself you can complete the extraordinary, then you will finally believe that you can.

The other day someone asked me if I would ever do something that was wild and crazy and scary. I sat back and thought, “Well, I don’t know if I would want to do that, but I definitely know that I CAN do that if I wanted.” I can accomplish anything, I know this because I free dived with sharks when I thought that there was going to be a cage- but I did it. I know I can do anything because I jumped out of a plane, took a dance lesson, and gave some blood.

I know what you’re thinking, wait… you? Kassidy? Who has ran for her life during a shooting and battled watching a love one die just now figured out you can make it through anything? After jumping out of a plane? Isn’t it scarier to run for your life?
Yes, but sometimes the lessons life gives us doesn’t teach us the things we thought it would. I’ve learned a lot from my trauma, but it didn’t learn to believe I can do anything. That, is thanks to my bucket list.

I am halfway through a year of bucket list items and something tells me I am just getting started.

To the person who questioned my why behind doing this, I hope you find or create your list of life and get to it- maybe you’ll discover a little bit about yourself along your voyage.

I hope my journey inspires you to live your list of life. The list that when you accomplish things on it, makes you feel full of LIFE! It makes you feel more alive than you’ve ever felt.
You deserve to feel alive.

I peed my pants

When I was little (and by little I mean a freshman in high school), I was TERRIFIED of moths. At one point there was a moth upstairs and there are only two bedrooms upstairs, mine and my sister Julia’s. So as I got Julia to attempt to kill the moth, it some how flew near me and I peed my pants.
No, I am not lying, I peed my pants because of a moth.

I was so petrified over that little guy that I urinated all over myself and the ground. Why in the world am I telling you this?
Because when I think back on that moment the truth is that fear brought me to peeing my pants. I was SO scared I could no longer control my bodily fluids… WOW.

Now I am at a spot in my life where if the thing I am chasing is not making me want to pee my pants, I am not chasing big enough dreams.
My whole life I was scared of moths, I let them torture me.
My whole life I was also scared of chasing my dreams, they tortured me in different ways. I would sit on the edge of what I thought would be a great idea and then I would talk myself out of it.

Do you ever feel like you’re dangling on the edge of something great?
But of course you’re not sure if it’s going to be great… or suck.

GRACIOUS & GRATEFUL THE SHOP

2020 is around the corner and I’ve got some big goals I’m THINKING of adding to my list. But if I’m honest, I’m scared- super scared. What if I don’t achieve the goals? What if they are TOO big?

Then I stop myself and try to remember, at the beginning of 2018 I wrote down I would figure out how to move across the county… and CHECK!
2019, I wrote down I would run a 10K after never running a mile in my life… and CHECK!
I’ve checked off every scary, pee my pants type of fear, I’ve ever wrote down on my New Years list… so if I’m going to the next level, what’s the difference? If I can do ALL those other things, why can’t I do the next thing that’s on my heart?

The only thing stopping me is me.
The only thing that is creating fear in me, is ME choosing doubt.

I have some LARGE, scary dreams I am going to accomplish in 2020.
But the first dream is choosing to believe in myself– choosing to set aside fear, be brave, and BELIVE that I can accomplish anything.

Because at the end of the day,
I am already a boss.
I am already a business OWNER.
I am already a runner.
I am already a great writer.
So I am already going to be great at whatever I accomplish next.

I’m not sure where I learned this concept but it’s stuck with me, “The only person who will believe in your dreams as much as you do, is YOU.”
No one, not your person, not your boyfriend, not even your parents- understand the thing that lights YOUR soul on fire. Only YOU will be able to remind yourself WHY you’re doing the thing your doing every day. Only you will be able to commit to chasing that dream every single day.

I’m dangling on the edge of something great, are you?
I’m going to accomplish that something great whether it’s today or next week or next year, are you?
Are you choosing to chase a dream that makes you wanna pee a little?

See it’s funny, the moth use to chase me and then I would pee my pants.
But now, I chase the moth HOPING I pee my pants a little.
Because peeing my pants only means I did the thing that scared me.
I conquered fear.
I crushed Goliath with a pebble.
I caught the moth.